writing is an elusive friend. sometimes he comes sometimes he goes. sometimes he is my closest companion, the only one who seems to be there, to listen, to share wisdom and advice, and to tell me things that I knew all along. And other times... he leaves me all alone. I sit down, attempting to call my muse as I desperately try to find the words to express how feel and he runs, never to look back at my perplexed and frustrated expression.
lately he's been unavailable, busy, fickle, mean, vindictive...
just gone.
trying coax my muse back so I can say what I mean to say,
M
28.6.09
14.6.09
11.6.09
Taking Stock
I'm too tired
I have a chemistry assignment to do
ha. add it to the list
It's so late
this is more pertinent
tomorrow I'll think about it
I can't think about it while I'm wearing pajamas
my eye hurts
I JUST DON'T WANT TO
But no matter how I try to push, shove, kick, or intimidate the thoughts out of my head, they keep worming their way into my stream of consciousness as if it was a rotten apple.
The worms:
It's time to reevaluate
check out my priorities
face reality
make some changes
do what I know I should be doing
have a heart to heart with myself
admit what I really want
make to do lists and do them
be productive
own up to my weaknesses
realize I can't do everything
find my happy place
Be a better grown up (even if I'm still pretending at it)
I'll start tomorrow.
hehe,
M
I have a chemistry assignment to do
ha. add it to the list
It's so late
this is more pertinent
tomorrow I'll think about it
I can't think about it while I'm wearing pajamas
my eye hurts
I JUST DON'T WANT TO
But no matter how I try to push, shove, kick, or intimidate the thoughts out of my head, they keep worming their way into my stream of consciousness as if it was a rotten apple.
The worms:
It's time to reevaluate
check out my priorities
face reality
make some changes
do what I know I should be doing
have a heart to heart with myself
admit what I really want
make to do lists and do them
be productive
own up to my weaknesses
realize I can't do everything
find my happy place
Be a better grown up (even if I'm still pretending at it)
I'll start tomorrow.
hehe,
M
4.6.09
advice to future me
You don't really like carrots. You think that you do, but every time you buy them they sit in the fridge for a few weeks until you throw them away.
Never wear mom pants. No matter how "mommy" you are.
You had a dream. To make a difference. Do. not. forget.
Stay informed. Remember what you love to do, see, hear
create
work on that indecisive thing. Trust your instinct and don't question it
never under any circumstances puff your hair up high, wear any sort of loose fitting jumper or clothing with animals/fruit/martini glasses on it, call strangers sweetheart or honey, or settle for anything less than you deserve.
Remember that one day you'll look back on this school thing with longing and wish for the endless days in the library, late nights with roommates, and poor dietary habits (oops. that's advice to present self).
be you. always.
M
Never wear mom pants. No matter how "mommy" you are.
You had a dream. To make a difference. Do. not. forget.
Stay informed. Remember what you love to do, see, hear
create
work on that indecisive thing. Trust your instinct and don't question it
never under any circumstances puff your hair up high, wear any sort of loose fitting jumper or clothing with animals/fruit/martini glasses on it, call strangers sweetheart or honey, or settle for anything less than you deserve.
Remember that one day you'll look back on this school thing with longing and wish for the endless days in the library, late nights with roommates, and poor dietary habits (oops. that's advice to present self).
be you. always.
M
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